tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15338049433467618642024-02-21T00:44:42.978-08:00Gentle Dove Projections"Igniting a fire in each individual; symbolizing the power of philosophy, the power of knowledge, the power of questioning! For it is only in questioning that light comes and is shed on the ignorant, dark and barren mind. It is only then that one understands!"
Jemmimah WJemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-60331381371951836042015-03-28T07:57:00.000-07:002015-03-28T08:30:00.746-07:00<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-GB">Rebuilding
the Walls<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Today I conjure up the emotions I’ve been suppressing that came as a
result of sights I’ve been disturbed by over the past few years and days. I go
over in my mind today’s state of affairs: internal, external, domestic and
global. I watch how the world has been ravaged by greed, hate and the
wickedness of man. I think to myself: how can I ever dream to be able to fix
this? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">I stare at the broken structure as Nehemiah did and I weep. I weep
not only because of the clear picture of what my people and all people of the
world will face because of the ruins I see. I weep not just because of the
picture of desolation, deterioration—a languishing of life itself. I weep
because all that has been placed within me, yet to be revealed in all its
glory, finds no place in this world. No, not this world, this time, this place.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">The trinkets buried deep beneath the surface, intricately laid down
by Him—therein you will find his will, the hope, the love, the yearning, all
inclined to rebuilding; yet all I see is tearing down. I tell myself, my
journey has not yet begun but the world may prevent me from having a true
opportunity to be. I cannot be, if I am not allowed to practice my being. My
being, always contingent on what He is saying…but the world wants no part of
Him. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">The powerful forces that be don’t want Him, so I know they will
ostracize me. I’m not their type, who they will seek after. I help others up, I
level the field, my solutions are ground breaking, world embracing theirs
palliative and debasing. I stare at the broken walls and the walls of my heart
feel as if they are on their last. Once fortified, shock absorbing, now ready
to crumble, ready to give in, no longer ready to be. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">This opening to me speaks of the wantonness of mankind. Freedom has
always been the goal, the means to some utopian end. This broken structure to
me, a clear result of going beyond the limit without preparing for what lies
ahead. Freedom they begged for and now they’ve received. The open space ready,
they have their belongings and they scatter without security, without
grounding, without a purpose. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">Today, I asked my creator, if it’s just my own understanding that is
blindly leading me to believe that there is no hope. I felt as if he smiled and
whispered “no this is your place, this is your home, you cannot find love,
peace and hope because I’ve placed it where it can be guarded, cherished, where
it can be flourished and shared and why else did you think I put you there? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">You are the hope, the love, the light, if you cannot find enough, it’s
because you’re missing. Get up, and you build what’s been broken down—your life,
your home, your country, the globe. You have been allowing the winds of chaos to
toss you, discourage you but alas you have consulted me, you lost yourself in the
world and the world is at loss because they do not have you. “<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">I stare at the broken walls and this time I find me. I see my
destiny, all that he has made me to be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Now I’m calling all builders to help me, help Him. He needs you now,
you’ve been chosen and if you agree, you’re in. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">He needs architects: those with eyes of faith and filled with
creativity; visionaries who see beyond the emptiness and see abundance, those who
can ensure the structure is fit and secure. He needs, masons: the strong, those
who can toil, lift heavy burdens and set pillars in place. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span lang="EN-GB">What are your talents, what are your gifts? There’s a chance they
were placed within you for such a time as this.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span lang="EN-GB">March 2015<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-73195246022083346282013-03-14T10:11:00.003-07:002013-03-14T10:11:46.826-07:00<br />
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<i>On Eros and Lust <o:p></o:p></i></div>
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<i>The Symposium</i> by Socrates has always and will always be a source
that I delve into as I thread the sometimes unfamiliar and raging sea of love.
Plato, the expert that he was, clearly illustrates to us that although a beautiful
feat, eros can also be a calamitous journey of the heart, the mind, the body. <o:p></o:p></div>
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He shows us the total peace and
the superfluity of all else when at the peak. Simultaneously, he shows us the
obsoleteness felt while in the “valleys of the shadow of death” and uncanny
elements of this eros when you have found the piece of your soul that wandered
without you and you yearned so much for.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Inevitably, a story of love is in
essence a story of beauty and tragedy—a conglomeration of peaks of happiness
and plummeting falls of excruciating pain. How can the two go together? How did
eros become ambivalent? How is all this possible?<o:p></o:p></div>
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In reality, there is a distinction
between love that is honourable and that which is dishonourable. Love should
not be ambiguous but rather has clearly defined lines that speak of the
consistency of the souls of the two people attached to each other. <o:p></o:p></div>
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If eros begins with love of
virtue and love of the soul and the mind, attachment will prove to be
beautiful, good—eros will initiate an everlasting bond without dark and deep
valleys. Instead, the journey will prove to be undulating. The destination
together is no longer the focus nor is who you will become; rather, who you are
and would like to be with your soul mate.<o:p></o:p></div>
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If eros would begin first with
mature unions, calamity will be avoided—estrangement, fear, emotional
impairment will not flood your path. There is one true love, just as
there is a true form of beauty and just as goodness is objective and can be
easily distinguished from things unlike itself.</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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Young love desires to quench
insatiable appetites. Young love. It is wandering, unattached and resembles
lust. It goes after what appears desirable and when this is achieved seeks the
next most opulent fleeting thing. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Love of the mind, of virtue, of
goodness and all that is beautiful is mature love, lasting love, freeing love,
respectful love, harmonious, florid and unconditional. This love can only BE
when appetites are quieted compatibility is achieved and evil cut off. <o:p></o:p></div>
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How can you hold on to the beauty
of mature eros with evil in your heart, darkness hidden away, the past buried
and trust hanging on a foundation made of mire?<o:p></o:p></div>
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To gain this beauty— trust, hope,
forgive, innocence, share light, expose, be wise, and exude the peace of God
that should live within your heart. Eros dwells in the gentleness of a pure and
contrite soul and can only find the like in the same and not the contrary.<o:p></o:p></div>
Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-22237611055537887732012-11-06T08:19:00.000-08:002013-03-14T10:18:01.274-07:00 Clean Hands and a Pure Heart - Both, Not one.Someone asked a good question recently that stirred me to write almost instantly. He asked: is it better to trust in actions or to trust in words?<br />
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If I was asked whether I trusted actions or words more-- I would choose actions, however; there are some important conditions that must follow.<br />
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I believe that it is imperative that we understand that actions are not more important than words, but instead they can be better trusted to understand someone's intentions than words would. The stark difference between the two is that words are fleeting, can change in a moment, can be blotted away but this is not as easy with actions. Once you are committed to an action and you follow through it cannot be erased.<br />
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My purpose however, is not to illustrate the epistemological difference between the two-- instead; it is important that I explain that actions should be married to words. It's about the heart and the hands-- the hands that work and the heart that allows the mouth to speak freely without the involvement of the mind.<br />
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Show me then close with words. If school was about being literally shown everything without a "talking forum" we would have to assume too much. Internalize this. If an action is left to stand alone it can become something complex and confusing to someone who understands concepts from a reductionist perspective. <br />
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We must also realize that both actions and words force us to use our SENSES to interpret the world. However we also know that these very senses given to us to be put to good use is limited. We know it is limited because its abilities are contingent on another bodily function. eg. We cannot see unless light hits the retina in a specific way. <br />
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It is no surprise then that our senses have failed us before especially in communicating with others who themselves depend on these tools of perception and who also may have been socialized differently or may possess a different personality. <br />
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Fortunately, misunderstandings can be curbed if both go together (Actions and words), ofcourse placing more emphasis on the one that eliminates the most doubt, we can make the complexity of our perceptions simpler. We can extricate ourselves from the complexities that come with assumptions that lead to assumptions that lead to assumptions....<br />
<br />Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-82683097960588714452012-07-30T10:01:00.002-07:002013-02-28T09:49:14.364-08:00What's so Real about REALITY?If reality is what we perceive it to be through our experiences with the world, then it’s subjective. If reality is subjective why do we call it re-al-ity? What’s so genuine about it? Is it because it seems less superficial or more logical than one we deem to have a “skewed view” of the world? Is it really?<br />
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Is there some true essence that makes it real or is that truth that seems to evade from things that move us, the effects of something inside ourselves? Things like love, pain, joy, hurt…yet these too are totally contingent on a structure that we can trace back to ourselves. It spirals right back, slowly, brutishly, gracefully…it moves right back to you—the source of all re-al-ity. <br />
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We talk about it like it’s something objective—simply because what we perceive it to be sounds a lot like someone else’s claim? Then tell me... in re-al-ity…what really is this “love” thing? A word we use to characterize the euphoric feeling we claim we have found when we have seen true beauty, true long suffering, kindness and gentleness… or even the exact opposite at times. But what is beautiful and what is long suffering? It depends on social construction...and is determined by context.Looks like we are back at one; made a full circle and came to no conclusion-- except ofcourse that our ideas coem from somewhere...a place within us, a subject. <br />
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The truth is… the birds probably laugh at our ability to see—yet we act as though our eyes can take us to an alternate universe. The manatee or the catfish, who many think are the less intricate animal, probably snicker at the thought that our feelings are enough to help us act logically on impulse. <br />
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The truth is our reality is what’s good to us….period. My pain is not your pain, my love is not your love, my truth is not yours and neither is my reality. What does this even mean? What’s the point? Is there ever a point even to life itself? What’s ever the point? <br />
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Before threading the waters of existentialism, let me say: thread lightly—you never know who you’re crushing, it’s probably some form that keeps your world bright or it might turn out to be the reason you’re alive. Not just that, but walk humbly for your reality is but yours and your perception bears way too many flaws. Last of all, be grateful because what you have may be little but a little of a lot of greatness.Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-56730799647155642212012-05-17T05:15:00.002-07:002013-02-28T09:49:56.274-08:00Dsyfunctionality- Thinking like "Women" Acting like "Men"...whatever that means...<div style="background: white; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;"><strong>The Black Death pt. 1</strong></span><br />
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;"><strong>"The Sprint to the Light....and the Jog Back to Chains"</strong></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTBLVpd9jq1bZELAe0ejIc_k8f_Fxafy8w557Ptt9i2wFodNChUrkzO0c304tMmFGQ2ZBUpN4_8iDT-OJA6taeEI3vzSxI9luSyk6GVT4iNjUcy8qMgNJk1Cu2srK7L86JAS67bi_0XQNZ/s1600/dysfunction.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" kba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTBLVpd9jq1bZELAe0ejIc_k8f_Fxafy8w557Ptt9i2wFodNChUrkzO0c304tMmFGQ2ZBUpN4_8iDT-OJA6taeEI3vzSxI9luSyk6GVT4iNjUcy8qMgNJk1Cu2srK7L86JAS67bi_0XQNZ/s1600/dysfunction.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;"><strong>I hate the fact that people blame the “black feminist movement” for broken black marriages where black women are successful and powerful partners today. </strong></span><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;"></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">In my daily internet browsing session I came across a video called “Why successful black women can’t find black men” and I was urged to skim the responses posted under the video. Almost instantaneously, I was disgusted by the remarks, clear misunderstanding and altogether ignorance of the people who received gestures of agreement by other spectators. </span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">I am not in total disagreement with the belief that some black women have misunderstood what independence means-- Steve Harvey would say they are acting like men (when you scrutinize their social roles) and thinking like women (trapped in a 1960's black romance novel). Rather, maybe as time has evolved women too must evolve as words like </span><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">independence are fluid— nothing in this world is static; even the word “change” is mutable. </span><br />
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">Most notably, circumstances are culpable for molding character, something that is inherently malleable. </span><span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">What am I saying? People must educate themselves, open their eyes and seek deeper reasons for legacies that persist in our societies. </span><br />
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">I know of many successful black women who have found men and are married (some happy and some very unhappy). For the unhappy many, I have observed that some financially secure women who have partners that are not as stable grow weary as the stark imbalances and incompatibility (intellectually and financially) become more pronounced as time goes by living under the same roof.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">This leads me to a greater question: why do successful black women settle? I am in no way implying that women are superior, but instead I am asserting that so far… the women I have come across in my very short journey who are in unhappy ,parasitic relationships have men who need to uplift themselves. Instead of looking to their successful female counterparts and shunning them because of their achievements, maybe they should shake off the idle spirit of stagnation and aim towards limitless progress.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">I have been blessed to be in a family that has made tertiary education imperative and in no way a choice. As a result I stand among men in my family who are lawyers, engineers, professors at Ivy league schools, mechanics who know how to carry the burden of providing for a family, faithful doctors and businessmen married to equally successful black women. My point? Maybe we need to recognize how much circumstances are to blame for many societal issues.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">Ultimately, marriage and long term relationships should be wholesome and equitable. This means that the two parties must be balanced in all aspects or near balance. Weigh it ladies and gentlemen or WAIT! </span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">In conclusion, maybe the imbalance in black relationships and the inability of black women who have achieved high acclaims and accolades to find men they are compatible with is two fold. You see this problem is not the consequence of “the black feminist movement” or any feminist movement for that matter. Rather, <strong>it marks the stagnation of</strong> many of <strong>our people</strong> mentally. </span><br />
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">Black men: “step your academic game.” Male marginalization theory my ass! Black women, open your eyes and try to understand our men. If we are to progress together, we need to work together and understand each other instead of assuming and judging each other based on flawed arguments. I am tired of the antediluvian arguments that place all blame on feminism and the black woman. STOP….think… rethink… then act! </span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">Maybe your thinking process should start with this question: what is feminism?</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">I can start answering for you. Although there are many types, phases and or waves of feminism with divergent visions, all movements aim to achieve social justice for women— these groups have recognized the continued subordination of women and how we are unfairly treated and so they fight for legal provisions among other necessities to level the playing field. </span><br />
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Georgia;">Leveling the playing field does not mean that we should totally forget or pretend that we are different-- the truth is we are all distinct. Therefore justice means that we must carefully analyse the picture and smoothen the creases...clear up the loopholes. Now… tell me… what is so wrong with feminism if you are not chauvinistic and sexist?</span></div>
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Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-66399625091407668552012-05-14T07:58:00.000-07:002012-05-14T11:22:58.211-07:00The Road to Free DoomHow far again would we go before our enchantment with the mechanics of humanity and the world lead us into nothingness? How much longer must we travel before everything that once held on to the bones that mark our history—the bane of our existence is annihilated? <br />
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How far is too far? Will “political corretness” the engine of human rights, propel us to a utopia where we all love and respect each other or will this take us ten steps back, far back…and as if we pressed the rewind button we travel past our not too distant brutal, barbaric and bloody history. Yes…we pass our capitalist—colonial—manifest destiny— era, before any black, brown, yellow…subordinated wo(man) could brazenly utter a word on “rights.” <br />
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Yes….political correctness—a term more poignant than someone smeared with feces; putrid yet stimulating to all those who fight for those once marginalized. They say “stand not for something and fall for anything” but what happens when you stand for everything do you not fall too because of the contradictions that you will face in joining things that seem all too similar to be disconnected when observed through a myopic lens? <br />
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Is my argument nothing but a slippery slope? To me there’s no slope it’s just slippery. Slippery because it marks how fleeting academia has become, how subjective, how unquestioning and accepting. Like a sociopath, or the black widow lures her prey who flies too close to her intricately designed snare. We continue to fly too high to the spider’s web in our aim to utopia we call social inclusion. <br />
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Humanity is still in that dark cave where there is very little light—the enslaved cavemen have only heard from those enlightened that there is an illuminating light outside, the tale they are told that what they see is not all that exists, but something greater lies outside. And as if they are having a lucid dream, these cavemen believe that the illusions that their deceitful eyes tell them is reality, fact, truth but instead they are nothing but skewed impressions of faulty perception on the cave’s walls. <br />
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And they continue to travel. Past the Magna Carta, the Declaration of a corrupt independence, past any constitution that spoke of inalienable rights that made all men equal. Past the establishment of Trinidadian Government when “discipline, tolerance and production” became something like the Indo-Afro Trinidadian mantra. How ironic! These words were meant to solidify independence from a colonial past, yet they speak of continued enslavement. <br />
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The “good” indentured labourer and slave was disciplined and the iron fist kept him moral. This labourer needed to be subordinate and do what was said by his master in order to be productive, productive for a common good that in retrospect seems like…the greater good (the good of the master that is). The only difference now was the attempt to penetrate racial lines that was necessary to rape the minds of these “ex slaves.” <br />
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Like a virgin who was about to consummate her marriage they forced in the word tolerance in the midst of these two functions and factors of slavery to make these two distinct groups shake hands, meet, function as a unit…again for their benefit. Tolerance and political correctness are one in the same. Tolerance: the act to allow deviation from a standard, to become less responsive. Tolerance is preached daily to mean something noble, something necessary, but taken for what it is, it can only lead to the “ dummifying” and death of the person. <br />
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The most tolerant societies today still have a citizenry who proudly wave their anti semitic and anti black flags in the front of their residences while greeting you with a smile be you black man or Jew. The truth is, no matter how socially active a sect of the population or how much this doctrine of tolerance is preached there is still hate in the hearts of man. Hate for different, hate for extraordinary hate for the “other”, hate for “them” and tolerance will never produce love. <br />
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The abyss is near and soon this subtly fascist world will crumble with all its corrupt ideologies that bear the so called “superstructure.” However, before this happens, human rights will not take the enslaved cave man to a place of freedom. The process has indeed been an incremental one but soon the stage will come when our eyes must be closed, our mouths shut up and like soldiers in a medieval army our hands stiffly to our sides and because our senses will have no use anymore we will all fall into a pit that was prepared for us. You see, before the physical came the mental “dummifying” so at the end there really would be no hope for mankind. <br />
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What then dare I say is right and wrong? Is truth objective or should the enlightened shape a world where the common good is truly the purpose of all life and are they then to determine the rights that should govern and establish society? Even Plato, the great philosopher that he was, recognized how complex and intricate answering this question was and though he believed in objectivity of truth and beauty there was some subjectivity in his utopian society. <br />
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I am no advocate of fascism or horrible acts like genocide and eugenicide but I do believe that we are taking many steps backward believing that anything goes without carefully dissecting all popular opinion and beliefs. The truth is just as we are not all the same, we are not all different and no matter how close our histories, they are all distinct. Forcing the connection between all groups and sects should not be our goal because in doing so our fall is inevitable because of the ample contradictions we will encounter in that quest. <br />
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Isn’t it futile for an enslaved man who only knows candlelight as his source to build his life around the beliefs of his enslaved brother whose reality is just as dark and limited as his own? There is no easy solution to transforming hateful hearts to loving ones just as it is hard for a busy New Yorker to find balance in the hustle and bustle of city life. <br />
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However, the way to a better place for all of humanity is that we interrogate all thoughts, beliefs, notions before we accept it. Interrogate by reading, writing and opening one’s mind to the opposing view and above all “mind your own business.” Plato never meant that we must be narcissistic and selfish, but instead he reminds us of the power of looking within for the answers. Furthermore, in doing so, doing yourself some good means indirectly doing all humanity some good. He may not have been an advocate for questioning in his mentally enslaving Republic but I do believe that the journey towards finding “self” and understanding one’s place in the midst of this beautiful mosaic we live each day will lead to love and happiness for one and all. <br />
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Speak your truth and I’ll interrogate your truth in love. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9U7ZZcFU1JfI0HMPSBm-oegdTrq5TDyx3RPOl1LXWBmWFHWXGi1hJli7JtdL76j5vNLnszM7qmuqdv1MULCauljh8rt9AWX_1JtTYFasHRijcRv4t2S56sfmbCXbmps2zsqMbePGr8huP/s1600/allegory+of+the+cave.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; height: 175px; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; width: 433px;"><img border="0" height="175" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9U7ZZcFU1JfI0HMPSBm-oegdTrq5TDyx3RPOl1LXWBmWFHWXGi1hJli7JtdL76j5vNLnszM7qmuqdv1MULCauljh8rt9AWX_1JtTYFasHRijcRv4t2S56sfmbCXbmps2zsqMbePGr8huP/s200/allegory+of+the+cave.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-14729160455905156282012-03-12T11:55:00.007-07:002012-03-14T07:34:59.038-07:00Remember when we were the victims?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1FP83IX-hAgk0zwUBc-_7oLnahAPrSWCiPqvxCpZ2jNKnd0Yq04UznaGHs8li96RurkIuJ67dhZZdvxLnPewS_f8-IVQ4EVfrEF2eF8c74knh3_WkPYp4zSE3TyEmh7QqL_Ej_ADTmgJG/s1600/each+one.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 196px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1FP83IX-hAgk0zwUBc-_7oLnahAPrSWCiPqvxCpZ2jNKnd0Yq04UznaGHs8li96RurkIuJ67dhZZdvxLnPewS_f8-IVQ4EVfrEF2eF8c74knh3_WkPYp4zSE3TyEmh7QqL_Ej_ADTmgJG/s200/each+one.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5719087960013482674" /></a><br />Where do you draw the line between “slactivism” and “activism”? Who determines what is right and wrong? If the problems within African countries are not ours are we to hold our heads and bawl with the feelings of hopelessness consuming us and… unrelenting disdain for those who we believe are higher powers—the ones greater than us the ones who stand on the hill and look down, as we look up, who we think control the world and the future? <br /><br />Do we focus on ourselves because charity begins at home and ends abroad? Where did we get this picture from? What about the whole “white man’s burden” theory and how are we to feel about the possibility, as “othered” persons, that this might be the hidden agenda behind all of this? What if something a lot murkier haunts this matter or lurks behind the echoes of voices screaming for justice?<br /><br />Yes, I believe that colonialism has not ended and rather than living in post-colonial societies, for many, we now live in neo colonial nation states that have strong ties to more than one oppressor. I do believe that capitalism is culpable for many ills we see and face daily but I do not believe that socialism is the simple solution. I do believe in the “white man’s burden” and I also believe that the opposite is true. I do believe also that pity can harm but pity can heal.<br /><br />I do believe that we must be careful of becoming “bandwagonists”—drifting in the wind with every fleeting thing that comes. I do believe that if you stand for nothing you can fall for anything as the cliché says. But I also believe that being bombarded by thought, literature, professors and students, classrooms and activist groups, Jehovah’s witnesses and the news, the media and sensationalists, that we may stand for many things and fall for them too. I do believe in the power of thought to drive but I too believe in the subjectivity and fallacious nature of the senses.<br /><br />In our world today where nothing is private—our lives are involuntarily and voluntarily posted to a site and our thoughts can be constantly updated for many to see, be it for the viewing pleasure of someone 10 miles away or 100,000, we realize more and more that the lines that at some time (or maybe never) outlined a boundary that determines foreign from local, me from you and us from them is now more blurred and vague than ever before. <br /><br />We all hear of globalization and combined with the goals and efforts of transnational corporations, media giants, international law and government, terrorism and NATO missions worldwide we know that globalization is alive and kicking and has its pros and cons. However, alongside this we also see strict immigration policies limiting movement among countries; we see how the “winners” try to secure their piece of the “pie” or the entire thing.<br /><br />What does this mean for all of us? What does this mean if we desire to put our hand with another—reach for another to help him or her up? The truth is, only you can truly know and understand your duty and purpose and I hope that by the end of this piece you are motivated to find this.<br /><br />My most significant belief is that we can find the solutions to many of our problems by searching inside ourselves. This mantra in itself is my answer when questioned about the rightness or wrongness of something like “the white man’s burden” or MAN’s burden.<br /><br />Man’s burden today after seeing countless sorrow filled United Way commercials and a proliferation of online videos showcasing the atrocities done to peoples globally all compel us to help if we can. Some say that we must bear our own burden before another; however, it is time that we see that the burden of one 100,000 miles away is our burden just as much as someone ten miles away—this is not the “white man’s burden” this is man’s burden. This understanding is the beginnings of humanism. <br /><br />It is time that we recognize the importance of letting go of selfishness and individualism and truly realizing the power that we can find in joining for a good cause. Why can’t we do both? We can simply show our hate for the crimes men like Joseph Kony and other rebels continue to commit daily while helping our neighbours. Uganda is our neighbour just as Southern Trinidad is—do not fall into the trap called “sensitization”. <br /><br />Why must we criticise those who are doing what they can to impede the unjust from continuing on their evil path? We must do our part and our responsibility as huMANs is doing what little we can with what we have to influence positive change. Be it posting flyers to “make Kony famous,” influencing policy makers to focus on a matter that has been marginalized in your own hometowns or illustrating to all within your local community and your global community the work that we all need to join hands to help with.<br /><br />We are not as selfish as we think—do not let this attitude consume you. We are not a separate entity—we all share this earth. We may be sovereign nations but we cannot survive on our own—we are not self -sufficient. The problem is a global one—do we target the smaller picture, should we see the problems through a microcosmic lens and forget the bigger picture or should we view the entire portrait? Understanding the intricacies of this matter from the ground is just as important as viewing it holistically…and this is what we must not forget.<br /><br />The root of the problems we face is not different but it may manifest itself differently across borders. The more we see world issues as our very own no matter how far apart our homes are….the more we will recognize the importance of working together to do our part. Let us put away paranoia, selfishness and skepticism and replace them with faithfulness, love and willingness to reach out for one with hopes of teaching one.<br /><br />Is our heart’s desire to maintain a world system where it is ok to feed our middle classed homes while the neighbour just across the street is going two days without food or do we envision a world where there is no hunger and food security for all? This may seem utopian but this is not impossible. <br /><br />I believe that some of the most virtuous values come as reactions that are the consequences of suffering. Maybe if we remember the values we were taught growing up from the ones who were directly oppressed and had no freedom and little will our world would be a happier place.<br /><br />Speak YOUR truth and understand MY truth in love.Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-89342173969127006482012-03-08T04:45:00.006-08:002012-03-08T06:58:20.491-08:00Connecting Girls, Inspiring Futures<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQoi9L84o4R8O084KasCo7Alxzcs5dGRWOFBhFPNzZI0uo_T5A7rGnwKX2Lpq6ItAMQhGjkEgfas-pmqQekjUEJ_A1bzbceYSTuQSUDVg1qBgNwQ-ikwYJgHO-wRlgVZ2MmvNKjwYtWuzC/s1600/iwd.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 186px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQoi9L84o4R8O084KasCo7Alxzcs5dGRWOFBhFPNzZI0uo_T5A7rGnwKX2Lpq6ItAMQhGjkEgfas-pmqQekjUEJ_A1bzbceYSTuQSUDVg1qBgNwQ-ikwYJgHO-wRlgVZ2MmvNKjwYtWuzC/s200/iwd.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717517507279261874" /></a><br /><br /><br />“A movement by ourselves but a force when we’re together”<br /><br />As our mission today focuses on utilizing social networking tools and the liberty given to us to speak out against the ills we face daily with hopes of connecting girls and inspiring futures, we ensure that our ultimate vision is kept alive.<br /><br />We must recognize that as the theme inherently states, by bridging gaps we inspire each other and in doing so we propel the movement toward a better future for women; in doing this we recognize that the quality of life, consciousness and drive of women all over the world are the determining factors in the shape the future will take.<br /><br />Furthermore, I implore you to take note that the word “connect”, although we tend to view in this context as a word solely representational of the power of the masses—we must realize that it begins with one. More explicitly, we must bear in mind that within each of us lies the will to powerfully inspire and change our future, the future of your community, your nation, our world. If we all do our duty as women in this universal movement, a better quality of life for all is inevitable.<br /><br />Our duty begins with understanding who we are and how powerful we are. Through self- empowerment will come the motivation needed to connect and through connection will come enlightenment for one and all.<br /><br />Each One Reach One; Each One Teach OneJemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-43866836564033817012011-05-17T12:54:00.000-07:002011-08-05T08:15:03.136-07:00Beautiful Baby Blake<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAvj9amFSPviLm-0OJZJP0BXcK1nCQOwCvchzaBiOLnpjBl8xe4ku-Whoe9A0HnRvAzUH9skSH7YtM2ozqagJraW8yPBcvwFDdZcjnFlo3vPmOT07LBJ3QLa76iDNgEIH-rIVrdLIQ_2SR/s1600/fetus-ultrasound.jpg"><img style="WIDTH: 200px; HEIGHT: 137px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5607777416530349714" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAvj9amFSPviLm-0OJZJP0BXcK1nCQOwCvchzaBiOLnpjBl8xe4ku-Whoe9A0HnRvAzUH9skSH7YtM2ozqagJraW8yPBcvwFDdZcjnFlo3vPmOT07LBJ3QLa76iDNgEIH-rIVrdLIQ_2SR/s200/fetus-ultrasound.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">Since there is no way that I can truly come to an understanding of where my racist ideologies morphed itself into a malignant growth, that stood there until it was confronted, I will recollect my fondest and most vivid memories to find some answers.<br /></p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">From a very tender age, I was obsessed with dolls—I loved combing their long flowing hair; I loved dressing them up and pretending to go shopping; I loved having love affairs with Ken and switching professions with Barbie. I was a veterinarian, pediatrician, model, actress, ballet dancer, mother and “fashionista”—I was Barbie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>But would I be given the chance to become any of these things in the real world? I thought so… after all, whatever Barbie could do, I believed that I too could. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes"></span>Somehow, I could not understand that my colour would act as an impediment in becoming most of what I wanted to be. I didn’t understand how the world worked yet, and even before I did, I had a distorted and dysfunctional view of what it looked like.</p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">I also remember, that in these very juvenescent years, I was lovestruck with the thought of having children. Somehow, I had already pictured what they would all look like and they did not look like me. They did not look like the countenance that my mother always starred at and chanted “ you are beautiful, my angel, so precious.” Where did these images come from and why did I desire to have these things or want these types of children? Where did this nebulous dichotomy of “pretty and fair” and “other and ugly” come from? I did not know that this would mean that I hated who I was. And that cancerous cell continued to grow…</p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">So many things happened in the in betweens. I went to many places, spoke to many people, took many classes, read books, dated and as I started to understand my world and the prisms through which I viewed it— the growth became known and with every lesson learned, with the dimensions of this brain forever stretching… I came to confront that growth and chip away what was there. The racist images that were filled with hate for myself and “othered” peoples all began to melt away—this growth had taken away all senses necessary for living from the beginning—since I was too young to understand them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I thank God that besides external forces, I had a family filled with “othered” people and a support system who praises “othereness.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><br /></p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">I’ve come a long way. I can stand and confidently say that I can see the beauty in any life form and this to me is a blessing from a creator who is good and has made all things good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>As a result, my understanding of “Black” is not what is portrayed and spread through the world via media giants.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Although I try not to categorize life, people and things by placing limits on them, I identify myself as a Black person—as problematic as it may seem.</p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">“Black” to me is a vast category with many divergent definitions. As time and place changes, its meaning transforms also. For this reason, I do not look down on how other people interpret it, but instead implore them to try to discover why they believe what they do and if its root is faulty they should shed some light on this and transform their thinking. </p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">To me, Black does not necessarily mean the connection to one race solely. Furthermore, being Black does not mean that you are solely or solely acknowledging being of partial or full African heritage. Black to me is mostly an attitude. Many try to connect the ghetto way of life and use this image as something synonymous to blackness. In that same breath, this “Black” attitude is what people who were movers and shakers of our world that we put the spot light on every February, exuded. What people fail to realize is that we all contribute to our image. With that said how have you contributed my brother, and you my sister? How do you add or subtract from the Black voice or the Black attitude?</p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">Being Black to me does not take away from any other ancestory that makes me …me, nor does it mean connecting myself to inferiority. Being Black to me is not accepting what the oppressor has deemed me as—it is the reverse, it is taking back what was stolen and refining it. Being Black to me is being beautiful, powerful, strong, a fighter, a lover, a leader, an intellectual, being who I am and loving who I am…it means being human. My Black is ambiguous, like the name Blake – and it shows just how stupid it is to truly see a multi dimensional entity through a one dimensional prism.</p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">I embrace my baby—Blake, I cherish him for who he is. This baby has replaced that tumor that proved to be detrimental to me and to “othered” peoples everywhere who believe that they have to think, look, speak and feel differently to be “superior”, accepted and better. I cherish my blessing, that is, my vision; I cherish the people who have helped me thus far in shattering fallacies and ridding myself of this growth; they have all helped birth this baby… my beautiful baby… Blake.</p><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love</p><br /><br /><br /><br /><p style="TEXT-ALIGN: justify" class="MsoNormal"><?xml:namespace prefix = o /><o:p></o:p></p>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-37605909323603255362011-02-22T21:24:00.000-08:002011-02-22T22:10:09.100-08:00The Scrub Complex<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjaDJTz6W9rzi1ppCImgDARzRXgu-uD1M10mDL2Zt68VHkv_L5PFxZldF_eIB-kn4qbg4Zd8eHbBcKOLMpeY-C94PYyNWooYoBrd7H-3OfFXoyPCjA7kUYcrd7Khi-2g5w2f3mSJTS2aTU/s1600/images.jpeg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 133px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjaDJTz6W9rzi1ppCImgDARzRXgu-uD1M10mDL2Zt68VHkv_L5PFxZldF_eIB-kn4qbg4Zd8eHbBcKOLMpeY-C94PYyNWooYoBrd7H-3OfFXoyPCjA7kUYcrd7Khi-2g5w2f3mSJTS2aTU/s200/images.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5576755725350292562" /></a><br /><!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">I’ve heard women say many things about themselves—I’ve heard them claim that, “we are simply complicated, emotional beings, strong, independent, a force, pillars.” Because these same women claim that they stand firm on their belief that they are all these great things…they say that the type of men they decide to court or “give a chance to” is reflective of who they see themselves as. That’s not the problem though… the problem is that I have detected, after much observation, that these same women parade the streets with “low lifes.” How could this be? Are these sisters blind, settling or plain dumb? Today I will like to explore <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">The Scrub Complex.</b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Initially, what is this complex and how does it come to be? In other words, how does one diagnose this complex and we will end by talking about how it can be alleviated. The scrub complex has surprisingly proliferated, especially in cities like Toronto where good men, who are confident and ready to be men approach women courteously, are a <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">SCARCE resource</b>. In cities of this type women have suddenly taken the place of their male counterparts as the <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">“er”</b> consequently making men the "<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">ee."</b> More explicitly, women are no longer the pursuee but <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">the pursuer, the</b> <b>payer</b> in all or most cases, the “<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">holder</b>” of the ball! To add to this drastic change in dating “protocol” we find men brazen enough to ask if the woman would desire to be the <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal">“proposer</b>.” The most confusing and contradictory addition to this is that they want to be respected as “the man” and treatedas the head of the home! Ludicrous right?</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Yes! It is in these places where we find women who are willing to lower their standards, do the unthinkable and marry or give chances to people who they know are incompatible in so many ways with them. Sisters are going against what grandmothers, mothers and aunts have been warning against…they are now saying “yes” to scrubs and enabling, reinforcing and propelling this sickness! They say it’s “ok for me to pay for his car to be fixed, it is my job to give him lunch money, it is my duty to pay when we go to dinner because I want him to see me as a strong, independent sister who can take care of her own.” My question is: when did “his own” become your own? What ever happened to “us” “our” and “we”?</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal">The diagnosis</b>: do you know you can do better than the person you have presently put yourself with after swimming through the rough waters of pursuing him? Are you sinking deeper into debt after the commencement of your relationship? Are you with your partner because you are just ready for a child and he seems to want the same things too? Have you convinced yourself that you must take on the role of “<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">er”</b> to be respected and loved and seen as a mutually benefitting individual with equal say in your union? Are you burnt out because you seem to not only hold “the ball” but you own the court, make the rules, make the effort, and feel like at the end of it all… you’re playing all by yourself? Then it’s clearer that you have fallen victim to the “Scrub Complex.”</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">However, don’t be afraid, there is a way out for you. The first step is severing ties from your scrub and with that knowing that it is not your duty to change him or force him to be someone he is not. After this, it’s important thatyou write down or meditate on who you see yourself with and what you want in life. It’s also imperative that you are realistic with your standards. After you have done this, let it “marinate” and sink deep into you cerebellum! Once you know what this person looks like…wait and don’t you settle. Trust me, you will know when he arrives! Who knows, maybe not just one person fitting the criteria will come along but many!</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Lastly, I think it is important that I make my readers understand that there is a difference between “catering to” your man and “spoon feeding” your man. Catering is great and necessary in any lasting relationship—you must show your partner you would go out of your way to show them the dept of your love and many times these things are very little things that can make a big difference (like surprising him at his lunch break for a quickie before he gets back to the tedious routines of office work). However, “catering to” your man is in no way “spoon feeding” you man—which is doing everything for him which can inevitably “stunt” his growth in your relationship.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Ladies… you do deserve better and you know it!</p> <span style="font-family:Cambria;mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Cambria;mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin;mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;mso-bidi-Times New Roman";mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:EN-USfont-family:";font-size:12.0pt;">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love…</span>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-34571677248172011482011-01-28T16:14:00.000-08:002011-04-04T14:49:19.290-07:00People Who Need People Part II<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaAdhBuu7NZL5o_bdOlTrUMX-wGN2uDCYb2Ta1n4j1MteRwVR4PuO0vBIjSfhSTn2bRr_uVQ6hk9Emyd4Gbrt03HKpY2cJZDILSWKUKPLoJC1MHYKjc01dWe5x1dGVRL6BouSFmdXzTsC5/s1600/images-3.jpeg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 199px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaAdhBuu7NZL5o_bdOlTrUMX-wGN2uDCYb2Ta1n4j1MteRwVR4PuO0vBIjSfhSTn2bRr_uVQ6hk9Emyd4Gbrt03HKpY2cJZDILSWKUKPLoJC1MHYKjc01dWe5x1dGVRL6BouSFmdXzTsC5/s200/images-3.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5567395058359529906" /></a><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 133px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjenka8GRIRFm0osrKs-h7dUcrhy_meBn1H0vzvJXh4sKallfUf2vF4Cgn96hi2qeNhw8o1-UMZI9up6-WL1_ERUbRVWIfCAlxX2orMkQTmGavNG8aEUm5ck4ccIAp3h5zyZf0sXck2wWSJ/s200/images.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5567395046330755490" /><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 169px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYCR9o1Oyh54bDndvYpqYOX7hO3sNDxjd649sEUmccuBcvW_mFBU6i8Jd9xoae0B8KSaGeVRTUPUnNcTFuuKOvDwNw6gL9ocrhDlmZbOAnCHsuMPc8AgXZWJlSN_y1FdcT7KwE5W5l01CG/s200/images-2.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5567395041646107426" /><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 149px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9G6UTKXv3dJcNq_RvbnO0Od4lGm-L2_jhyphenhyphenP4OaP_5aQPz3xKSzm_XCBynvCVb5U01oYhSoYXYL1JU8GI3c07Q5Hc9mCXdTZfPcVtwZdgOWFssqKbt2uCETLbRP0G8lcfvEKPFZYvwqfHD/s200/Voiceless.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5567395036129606226" /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="text-align:center">The Time Will Come</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Have you ever felt like a spec of dust in a world filled with monolithic rock? Have you ever? Have you ever felt that no one truly gets it or can connect to you even among your many colleagues? Have you ever? Have you ever had an experience where you were overwhelmed with thought and you felt as if you were drowning in it; you are so exhausted with all your knowledge that you feel like it is too much to contain and it is slowly strangling you? </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Have you ever woken up from a dream and straightway ran for your paper and pen, and without effort, without much thought a story wrote itself? Have you ever made art and felt disconnected from the story it told? Well I have. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Below is a story I once wrote. I’ve never been physically or mentally abused—I’ve always been surrounded by love, but one day my pen and my inner self wrote a story that the Jem on the surface at that time had no idea about. As I reread it, so much emotion consumed me. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">I chose to share this poem today only because after years of not knowing why that story was relevant to me and where it came from, the reason unfolded today. I realized today that I too can relate to the misery this girl faced and like this girl, time was the ingredient necessary in fulfilling destiny. I’ve reached a certain milestone and only now does “it”… all make sense.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;line-height:15.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align: none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma; mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">The Silent Voice<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-pagination: none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">My cries, my voice no one can hear.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Loneliness, darkness ever so present, to wake up from this horror my prayer.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">To return your ghastly scoldings; to swear at you at the top of my lungs,<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">To incarcerate you in a lonely cell...and your voice like mine so silent...<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Only echoes of your cries you'd hear.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">I wish just once I could be heard!<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">I'll tell all the untold stories, the novel of pain my tiny body has to bear.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">The times you'd tower over me, you ogre, you dragon, you beast...<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">My little voice....ever so silent.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">You were my predator, for years I've been your prey,<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">But I know one day I'd be tall, I'd be unstoppable.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">I'd have a voice and sweet vengeance would take lead,<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">And you, not me, would have to plead.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">All the torture, all the pain, the emptiness...<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">The void in my heart would always remain...NEVER erased from my mind.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;mso-pagination: none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Although Just a little child I would remember all the episodes with you and me...<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">that made me wish I'd never seen this world,<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">that made me wish that she who bore me never died,<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">that made me wish I could turn back time...<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">turn back time to that night you planted your seed<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">and her heart beat raced and your breaths were deep.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">For now....my voice, like the sound of silence<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">But when I own that voice--liberty to speak, I'd repay you for all this pain<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Memory won't fail, because they're engraved<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt; text-align:center;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace: none"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;font-size:13.0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">etched in my obscure mind, my tiny heart...my </span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">little brain.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="text-align:center"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> </span></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">J.Wilson (2007)</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">I can now relate after four years. Four eventful years where I’ve made academic institutions my second home. I’ve been bombarded by critical thought, theorists (dead and alive). I’ve been awakened by life itself; life and its struggles, the quandaries it brings, friends that weren’t even associates. Through this time I too like this little girl was faced with physical and intangible elements that prevented me from saying, doing, reacting speaking! I’ve been guarded; I’ve allowed people, schools, professors, friends, ideologies and the status quo to silence me. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">This silencing was implicit, this silencing was destined to be, it commenced at my birth and if I remained unconscious of it, it would proceed to do the same till my death—hampering me from letting out my deepest cries of hope, joy, love, emancipation. The thing is, time has matured my mind, opened it and though physically there might be no sign of growth, that “little” mind has now acquired the necessary ingredients to allow this woman to speak out. I’ve found my voice in all the chaos!</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">The next step for me is to figure out what I want to use this voice for. Is this voice that of a revolutionary? Should I use it to share knowledge and simultaneously gain it? Should I go on fulfilling the dream of someone else or use my voice to reveal another path unknown to me?</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Like this little girl, my chance has come as time has passed and I am grateful for the people who have all led me to this epiphany.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">If you have felt like this girl, like me, like the oppressed, suppressed, abused, misused… you are not alone, but remember, your voice will come and when it does it’s up to you what you do with it!</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love….</p> <!--EndFragment--> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-71872431716728519592011-01-25T13:21:00.000-08:002011-01-25T14:15:02.495-08:00PEOPLE WHO NEED PEOPLE part 1<img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 134px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDTv7JnYVR05D8FM589GmtQawFcik3gwIAHxzwDmGoiPuVLLHCpmnBotK-IuKj4yC8Por_fAlZhQWPXF8rYnO3eEBQ1W3GCL7jmIxK-qvYqd97rRW3SbyppBn2QXvX-upHPPjP5PVmkIz5/s200/images-1.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5566244762162488066" /><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 133px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi651MxnaJXWYPhHb2fL1bVJOYAl57MzwD5afXLHT5Fe-tsK2_Rynd6wkllWv40mu4UmtasCLlDawTceiM5XfT0vT4_imgqYrL59TBDcaDfaaM0Nmm_nY_rvS5jq-mWUWfil0xkSy1b_rmp/s200/2112455811_b9e9a142da.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5566244756368092242" /><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 134px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizmJa1BFXeX0EAZMGWEv1_7NBYlzLDxJtVI6WBXQEF6E6G4yYIUdYkmKsJc14fotv0hROpvKnKVzPhUVxTfH4-kNgQzU84QkTZaf0_kERNiX_c2IAklU71e92Zmg44sV7v3koyHctymgSG/s200/9110069-large.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5566244751338093010" /><br /><br /><iframe title="YouTube video player" class="youtube-player" type="text/html" width="480" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/UOZ3SKKYKmE" frameborder="0"></iframe><div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><b><br /></b></span></div><div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#0000EE;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000000;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 250px; height: 250px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv7F7D1FBreaFWt-VIoIxVHZCCe8AxK7J1aCFwG0sj_KamGnYFEcTAkuyMOWb8fioJo1BAJ3-PCtxmOXKUcYrbg8mb_kcPIIQq7La0zALOxAO7ox8oB1-xDq17Aaf8IiFzN0wWugfb1AvR/s400/4-250x250.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5566238856379941506" /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: none; "><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv7F7D1FBreaFWt-VIoIxVHZCCe8AxK7J1aCFwG0sj_KamGnYFEcTAkuyMOWb8fioJo1BAJ3-PCtxmOXKUcYrbg8mb_kcPIIQq7La0zALOxAO7ox8oB1-xDq17Aaf8IiFzN0wWugfb1AvR/s1600/4-250x250.jpg"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: none; "><u></u></span></a></span></span></p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv7F7D1FBreaFWt-VIoIxVHZCCe8AxK7J1aCFwG0sj_KamGnYFEcTAkuyMOWb8fioJo1BAJ3-PCtxmOXKUcYrbg8mb_kcPIIQq7La0zALOxAO7ox8oB1-xDq17Aaf8IiFzN0wWugfb1AvR/s1600/4-250x250.jpg"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: none; "><u><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center; display: inline !important; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">DESCRIPTION:</span></span></b></p></u></span></a><div><div style="text-align: center; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#0000EE;"><u><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; "></p></u></span></div></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 238); -webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: none; "><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000000;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; display: inline !important; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: none; "></span></span></p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><div style="display: inline !important; "><div style="text-align: center; display: inline !important; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#0000EE;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000000;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; display: inline !important; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">“He is confident, strong, intelligent, he has two to three degrees, a stable job,he is h</span></p></span></u></span></div></div></span></span></u></span>andsome, desires to be a family man, good with children, always there and spiritual….. If you see him, please let me know and tell him I am looking for him. </span><p></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Yes, Freud may have been on to something; although he may have been chauvinistic, sexist and and one who placed too much emphasis on the phallus, but could it all be true? Do women look for their fathers in their partners? Are we doomed to wander this earth till he matches the qualification of status: ideal dad? What does this mean for us then?</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">The scary and most problematic part of this however is not a new observation but one that we can all relate to because it is ever present in society today—daddies are MISSING!!! The fact is that we seldom find families where the fathers are active members and consistently there. What am I saying? </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">If fathers are present, they are not role models, when they are not present, there is no male figure that compensates for it. Where are we getting this sketch, image, ideology and “ruberic” from? Furthermore, since this is not in fact what we are seeing at home and therefore desiring, is that ok? Is it ok to have these standards? Is this ideal father figure a myth that no one man can match up to and if yes, are we doomed to be alone? What are the consequences of this and how do we overcome it?</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">First and foremost, it is not ok to have standards and not know from whence these desires came. This blog is about awareness and searching for answers, so I first implore you to figure out why you want this type of man. If your standards are based solely on indoctrination by media or peers, please, begin by finding out more about you and what you need in a partner to compliment your complex personality. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Secondly, this ideal sketch that most women have is sometimes unrealistic. Having standards is not bad however, but I urge you to have goals that are realistic! Good, great and phenomenal men exist so NO whatever you desire in a man (once your goal is realistic and matches compliments you) is not a myth. YOU ARE NOT DOOMED to be alone! </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Also, for those who do have great dads who are active members of her family, I know that you too face issues much like those who have no visible father figure. Most of you want to test the waters. You do know that having a great man is the standard and your ultimate desire, but ”is this all there is” you ask yourself. You think that there is more out there to experiment with, you do not want to settle until you find out if there’s something better than daddy. Besides this, you compare men you meet first with daddy, if he does not meet daddy’s image you get rid of him, no matter of the way in which he differs from your dad is really insignificant. The n you wonder why you are alone!</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Oh, let’s not forget those who had strong Independent women as role models in place of present fathers. </span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Most of you who are avid readers of my blog, I know that you are familiar with M.I.S and we see again where this syndrome can develop! Yes, it happens in this circumstance—you believe that you can do it all by yourself! </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">However, M.I.S is just one complex that is birthed in a society like our own where we are searching for the non-existent, never present, extinct dad! Besides M.I.S, the SCRUB COMPLEX is born. I will have to expound on this in my next post.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">In conclusion, this is not a problem for one race, gender or class—this is a societal problem, for all PEOPLE. Knowing that this issue exists, it is important to be aware of the standards that have and make certain that they are realistic and tender to your personality and needs. Lastly, be hopeful! There is someone for everyone and with realistic goals and by knowing SELF… he will make himself present and you will KNOW who he is when he comes.</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love.</span></p> <!--EndFragment--> </span><p></p></u></span></div></div></div>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-6247907701922806002010-10-23T21:23:00.000-07:002013-02-28T10:19:12.064-08:00If you Wanna Wait then Weigh It<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiICrhTfAOr1AtLTJ9cP3PtdaI4nmpvCMiIOwB_uuhXBdxLQkNgfyO_JR4uAzcMTnapST8BbGZbPoxn6RT5gGqogCWJz8zZaxRJDp3LE5ezccyNXyL3B1xv7RlgZgYa0olFGIimqVrrgCv-/s1600/Waiting-for-Mr-Right_298x187.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5531464137541707154" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiICrhTfAOr1AtLTJ9cP3PtdaI4nmpvCMiIOwB_uuhXBdxLQkNgfyO_JR4uAzcMTnapST8BbGZbPoxn6RT5gGqogCWJz8zZaxRJDp3LE5ezccyNXyL3B1xv7RlgZgYa0olFGIimqVrrgCv-/s400/Waiting-for-Mr-Right_298x187.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 187px; margin: 0px 0px 10px 10px; width: 298px;" /></a><br />
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Recently I've recognized that I have a stark intolerance for queues of all types and sizes and as time goes by it has become more pronounced. I despise waiting on public transit, I absolutely detest waiting on company, I hate waiting for my flights to be ready for boarding and it's probably obvious that the worst part about traveling for me is waiting for my luggage (that's why if I can, I travel light so I don't have to check my suitcase)...but worst of all, I abhor the fact that according to what the old ladies say, I must wait on Mr. Right. But why grandma? I am the most impatient person in the world, so impatient that I am impatient to learn how to be patient.</div>
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Furthermore, why is patience a virtue? Maybe because not many people prove to be strong enough to withstand the odds that lead you to "give up" on something or someone? Who knows? However, the question most important to ponder on is: are these wise folks correct and must we wait it out; or do we keep our vision 20/20 and jump on the bandwagon when we think what's right in front of our faces is right for us to spend our forever or whenever with? To add to these mind boggling questions, what if the one who is right in front of our faces, the one we think is all we need... what if his eyes are not on us or he is just not ready to commit? What if that person you have your heart set on rejects you?</div>
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I'm not done yet with the questions! How long do we wait if we should wait for him (the one we have our hearts set on)? What about the Mr. Right who's the question mark... how long do we wait on him before turning to <i>eharmony</i> or some other social networking site people utilize these days to find partners? Is there a set amount of time to wait? Is there a sign that we must be ready to acknowledge so we'd know if to stay or leave? Damn... why is this relationship thing so complicated? Or is it that we make it complicated? Too many questions? Maybe!</div>
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Enough questions, time for some answers. Initially, I think that if there is one question that must be answered among the plethora listed above, I believe it's the "should I wait on the man who I love but does not love me" question. Waiting is not easy, it may be an indication that the love you have for that someone is true since you are willing to put all else aside to focus your emotions and every inch of your being on this one person. If you want to wait, weigh whether your decision is hurting or helping your well being. However, remember that you must love you, care for you, treasure you, all in all put you first! Ultimately, the reason why you would be inclined to wait on a person is because you think it will be beneficial to you in the end. However, waiting can become like a wound that still bears the instrument that punctured the body and that grows worse and hurts more everyday. In this case you might want to reconsider why you are waiting. </div>
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Furthermore, some people may be inclined to ask if the amount of time you know a person is a determining factor about whether the feeling is love or infatuation. My answer is NO! You can know someone for two decades and be confident that what you have for that someone is love, but after two decades and a day, because of an epiphany, you realize that whatever the feeling is that you have for your partner is not love. Furthermore you may know someone for months and know in a heart beat that what you feel for that individual is so much deeper than infatuation and like nothing you have ever felt before. After all, if we could measure love, how would we weigh it? As it would seem, like many other emotions we battle to explain... love is just not that simple. So beware of the people who act like they are "love experts"... in fact they are most probably charlatans!</div>
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Lastly, ladies and gentlemen, it is important that you recognize that you can find answers within yourself. Weigh the options, weigh the consequences of waiting. Why is it you think this person is the right one for you? Most of all, live your life, love, laugh and have tons of fun because if you don't you might turn yourself into the living dead. If he is the one, if she is the one... even if you leave or wait "it" will happen and that's just the truth!</div>
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Speak the truth and accept the truth in love.</div>
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Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-44430110779933123812010-10-03T17:25:00.000-07:002011-02-03T21:44:09.748-08:00Losing my "Virginity"<div style="text-align: justify;">I can just imagine how fast your heart is beating right now and how focused your eyes are on the monitor. I can just imagine the questions that are flooding your mind and the assumptions that you are being plagued with. Well now my readers, before you start thinking about how brazen or, for others, ludicrous I might be for writing about what you think I'm writing about-- stop and take a deep breath. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Today, I will need you to be calm and ready to explore some plains that your mind may have never ventured to before. Furthermore, the topic I am about to explore will make it necessary for you to clear your mind and as you sit there, most likely in a very nostalgic mood, I urge you to go beyond the surface of my words in this entry; after all, words are never sufficient for me and sometimes a sound or movement better suffices. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Initially, there are some key words that must be examined. First: sex and subsequently, sexual intercourse. Finally, I will state the definition of virginity and words synonymous for this according to Webster. The phenomena we term as sex is defined as the sexual union involving penetration of the vagina by the penis. Furthermore, intercourse is defined as "doings between individuals or groups" and "the act of penetrating the vagina with the penis." Lastly, virginity is explained as "being in an original, unspoiled state. The dictionary follows by stating that virginity is synonymous with words like "innocence, decent and pure."</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Combined, we have an interesting conglomeration of words that explain the process of the removal of a specific barrier that one once attained and the process of transitioning from the once "original" to a new opened state; to a new world that makes you no longer innocent or pure. If you know your Bible or Quran well enough, this may remind you of the story of Adam and Eve who became impure when they exposed themselves and partook of the tree of knowledge of Good and Evil that they were told to ABSTAIN from. Doesn't it? Can you see where I'm going with this?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Furthermore, consider the act of sex and begin to contemplate about the many reasons why restraining oneself from sexual intercourse is deemed so necessary in our societies. Some may quickly assert to the fact that many of our "modern" societies are founded on moral theories that are directly related to the strong presence of Judeo-Christian and Islamic doctrine that prove to be the foundation upon which they stand. However, besides this somewhat sociological explanation, can we go a little deeper than the surface?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">In my exploration of this phenomena, sex is just another mechanism used to control the powerless. Sex is so powerful that if one is able to control someone's sex life, one can certainly control all other components of the individual. Think about it. Now that you've taken some time to contemplate on this, who has manipulated you by controlling your sex life, how do they do it and how does it make you feel? For those who have lost their virginity, does your life (relationships, worldview, opinions) change after you begin having sex? Interesting, isn't it?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">To continue, do you recognize some fundamental features of virginity? Firstly, to lose one's virginity means that you must have something to lose in the first place-- there is a transition from one state to the next, it is transitional. Additionally, an extremely interesting fact is how much you gain or do not gain from losing. More explicitly, consider the emotions, exchange of moments, thoughts and energies that are essential features of this process which may consequently lead to many benefits or devastating negatives. Now don't you agree that it seems like it shouldn't necessarily be explained as "losing"? Shouldn't we call it exchanging? </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Furthermore, now that we have explored all these concepts, can you see how a closed mind can be equated to an pure, innocent, unpenetrated yet not in the least sense impervious ....virgin mind? With that said, I must say that this past summer was the most eventful and devirginizing summers of my very short life. However; unlike every other phase of my mental, spiritual and emotional growth, I have gained so much information from these events that I wouldn't have if I had a closed minded approach to viewing each situation. Furthermore, my mind has been enlarged so much that with each PENETRATING idea, thought or action initiated by someone in close relation to me, I have gained so much knowledge; and it is true, knowledge is power.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Additionally, I urge you to recognize that we live in societies controlled by the rich and powerful who are parasites that feed on the people who are what I consider their host. If you are closed minded and unaware of your BODY they will control it. Furthermore, they will control the activity in which has the most power over all the components of your life. Upon recognizing this, decide if this is symbiotic relationship or parasitic and let this determine your mode of REaction.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">On another level, take some time to identify who has the most power in your life and how they attained such high status? Is the intercourse mutually beneficial-- is it an exchange of valuable entities across the board or are you a big loser?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Lastly, I hope that this entry will lead you to continue questioning powerful forces, people and phenomena. Furthermore, I hope you truly get the message I have attempted to share. If you think I'm saying that you must go find a male or female and have sexual intercourse or begin to have it now if you have not yet begun, please, re read the entry and think some more...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love.</div>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-62689235310969018812010-08-09T11:51:00.001-07:002012-03-08T07:31:02.831-08:00Diaries of an Emotional ThinkerBeing in a class entitled "The Philosophy of Sexuality" this summer has certainly opened my eyes yet baffled me simultaneously. However, most importantly it has led me to question many things that I once thought I had understood. With these once clear topics now blurred, and with a recent trial in my life I was forced to think of the events in my short journey that made "Jem"... Jem. But who am I and what aspect of me am I referring to today? Today, I am referring to the emotional Jemmimah.<div><br /></div><div>I was always a sheltered child, yet I grew up in a home that was always open; open to those in need. Just like the case of where I grew up, many more oxymorons were present. I was raised by a mother who was attached to me, yet would always tell me the cold, sometimes brutish truth. As I blossomed, I was the quietest child at school and the most talkative at home. I was the kindest, yet the most aggressive. And as I grew, the once ugly duckling eventually became a "swan" and the girls that became my friends treated me like a gem that needed to be constantly babied and protected; yet they themselves were tough, out-spoken and sometimes rebellious.</div><div><br /></div><div>Then tragedy struck...I lost two of my best friends (in the same year). Then I lost a young woman who I admired since I was little. I called her "Dawn" and I remember sharing many memories with her when she would take me from my mom to spend weekends at her house. With the already present paradoxes or "ambiguities" that shaped me, these tragedies turned me into an "emotional wreck" and I was totally oblivious to this.</div><div><br /></div><div>Yes, Circumstances made me who I am today. However, how does this so called emotional girl love without seeming to be needy? How does she survive in a rational world where reason is favoured and emotion scorned? As I was led to think on this I had an epiphany.</div><div><br /></div><div>So many times we see the world in binary: black or white, on or off, male or female. These ambiguous dichotomies that were already constructed for us that we sometimes force ourselves into are not necessarily the way we ought to view the world or the things within it. This girl has been told she is "overly emotional" only because she is not always rational, she allows the heart to lead her many times and gets tossed into the "emotional" category. But who said that there is no reason in love? At that moment, I reflected on one of my favourite quotes by F. Nietzsche that says "there is always some madness in love; but always some reason in madness." </div><div><br /></div><div>Furthermore, I realized that this blog in itself, a space where I write at great lengths mostly about love and relationships is enough evidence that I am not just a member of the "emotional" group, but I am a thinker; I'm an emotional thinker. Nietzsche is right once again; whoever said that loving means absence of reason and absence of the mind does not really know love.</div><div><br /></div><div>In conclusion, emotional, rational or other, free yourself from these ambiguous categories! Furthermore, do not feel discouraged or ashamed when you make decisions based on emotion- sometimes they make sense, sometimes they're probably the best choice you could have made! </div><div><br /></div><div>Speak the truth and accept the truth in love...</div>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-23336607989263683812010-07-05T09:02:00.000-07:002010-07-05T10:47:03.699-07:00Contracts PT. 1<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">Fear is the Mother of Morality F. Nietzsche</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Why do we love the things that are bad for us? I’ve often found myself bound in fetters where I’ve been doing the greatest injustices to myself and self inflicted pain has been the “cause of death” or near “death” experiences. However, the more interesting question would be: why is it that most of us who try to live circumspectly, who are organized and strive to be consistent end up loving these bad inconsistent things that lead to self infliction? </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Renowned philosophers in the world of academia spent all their time talking about one thing, the consequences of these things and how man should or could live because of it. This thing is what we call the “social contract.” Just like this contract, every contract has some things in common and today I will attempt to highlight these similarities that may be the key to answering some of these mind- boggling issues.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">First of all, why in the world would we make ourselves bound to something or someone? Furthermore why is it that the social contract, the institution of marriage, three year phone agreements and even unwritten ones between two people are so socially accepted? Now, I may seem to have all the answers but I implore you to sit and think it over today. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">In my perspective one reason why society holds on to and praises these contracts is because of FEAR and as humans our priority is to survive—to protect ourselves in an insecure world. One wise person once told me that as humans two emotions propel our actions: fear and love. What is important to note however is that whether a contract is entered in based on love or fear changes the consequences and or duration of the contract.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Furthermore, those who are the most organized and circumspect in this world are most likely the ones who are most afraid to face mistakes and the consequences they bring. Because they are afraid they tend to enter into many contracts that assure them that there will be stability and security. However, in a world of uncertainties and instability no matter how many contracts they enter into, they never find peace of mind or a static life. Instead, they live miserable lives filled with depression, fear and worry; these worriers live in shackles. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">One of my favourite quotes is: don’t forget to live while preparing for tomorrow and don’t forget tomorrow while preparing for today. Yes you need to think ahead but enjoying the moment is just as important. To my worriers, insecure, overly organized people who would do anything for security: relax and live. After all, you will learn so much more be open to so much more if you let go of your fears and live, the fortified walls you built in your life can be destroyed by life itself!</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">For my secure, over confident and disorganized folks: tomorrow is not promised but that does not mean that preparation is not imperative; you attain so much from life when you prepare. Furthermore, I’ve realized that sometimes spontaneity requires preparation…think about it.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">There are so many differences between love and fear and the consequences they bring vary… but LOVE...it conquers all….</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Speak and accept the truth in love.</p> <!--EndFragment-->Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-72075479922369563462010-06-03T09:47:00.001-07:002010-06-04T18:41:28.773-07:00Priceless Before Refinement<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">They say diamonds are forever, but where on earth did this cliché even come from? After some research I've realized that it's only forever because of what it represents after refinement. It is because of this same notion that we view our value the way we do as humans in a materialistic world and the very same reason why we strive to be who we are not.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Recently the trials of life left me in a state of questioning and in this moment I asked myself: is the gem in the rubble the same gem in the jeweler's hand after it is refined? Does this gem have the same worth in both situations? How do we give things value and is our form of price tagging efficient; is our way of price tagging correct?</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Initially, before the drama I recently got myself so deep into had happened I was swayed to believe that it was only when the “jeweler” took that material and placed it into the fire, shined cleaned and worked on the material, that the diamond became a diamond. I was made to believe that while in the dirt and the mess the diamond was nothing but a valueless piece of rock. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Furthermore, it is only when the rock is taken, it’s environment changes and now in the glass of the jeweler’s diamond display after refinement, it’s price is attached. Consequently, only when a purpose of worth comes along and we are used as ends in ourselves and not means to an end, we become valuable. Finally, the only conclusion that one can come to if these premises are correct is: the diamond is a diamond only because it is used for a specific purpose and given value by a specific person.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">However if we apply this to finding our worth or value as people, although we tend to be accepting of this way in which diamond acquire their value, in this materialistic world that we live in, it is evident that this may not be efficient, correct or healthy. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">We are made for a purpose and it is not when we go through fire that we gain our worth. That rock only changes in appearance but the value, intrinsic value NEVER changes. When we live our lives and give ourselves worth based on someone else’s way of measuring beauty or character we are fueling materialism and guided by our world’s criteria of what "beauty" is.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Instead, knowing your worth doesn’t mean knowing what someone says you’re worth. The jeweler does not give the rock it’s value, your parents loved ones or friends do not give you your worth. Furthermore, overcoming life’s battles and learning does not give you your value, nor does your change of environment or crowd—the fire does not change your inherent pricelessness. Instead, it shows you how much work you need to go through in finding your purpose-- it's part of a process to find purpose not one that gives value.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Knowing your worth comes only when you know who you are, why God has placed you here and you strive to do that which he has set out for you to do. The fires and refinement is only symbols of nearing perfection and that in itself does not mean you’re any better in value than you were before. You were never a means to an end; you were always an end, you were never a bridge towards a goal, you were always THE goal. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Ladies, and my few gentlemen readers, hear me out today! You are your purpose and this is essentially what has made you priceless, not what family you were born into and where you can potentially reach in life. Was the man in the manger (the place where animals feed) any less than the man on the cross? Did his worth ever change depending on his age or what he went through?</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Furthermore, the fact that God made you, no matter if you are copper, stone, glass, rock, crystal or diamond; you are here for a purpose. Now I implore you to live and learn and find YOU bearing in mind that you are here for a reason, and you being here is what makes you PRICELESS! </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style=" ;font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love.</span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family:Georgia; mso-bidi-font-family:Georgia;font-size:16.0pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><o:p> </o:p></p> <!--EndFragment-->Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-22475347341127142722010-05-31T10:57:00.000-07:002010-05-31T11:29:05.773-07:00Get in the MIDDLE when you're stuck in the MIDDLE: Finding Balance<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">The bible says in Hosea 4:6 that God’s people will perish for lack of knowledge. Yes, Jesus was talking about his church but this can also be seen daily while we journey through life. However, my question is do you perish when you have the knowledge but you lack wisdom? I know some of you are thinking at this very moment how could that even be possible; knowledge and wisdom go together. </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">However, one day a very wise person told me that "knowledge without wisdom is ever present in our day and age and we know it’s there because humanity has so many ways of pointing to the problems but lack a practical solution."<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>With that said, today I want to talk about this very same notion except we’re not talking about rocket science, geology or physics, today I want to talk about the possibility of your body languishing because of blindness in your relationship. Furthermore, I want to talk about how you can risk the chance of “perishing” when you have all the causes but no solution—knowledge without wisdom.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Have you ever been in a relationship that is forbidden by your family or close friends; a relationship where people make known to you all the flaws of the person you look to for help, strength and love and you just don’t seem to see what everyone else is seeing? Instead, your emotions have led you to overlook their imperfections and just love the person that you think they are. Then come the boldness—when confronted with striking news and evidence, your love for that person makes you a brazen defender for him or her and you are ready to attack any person who says a bad word about that person you love so dearly. Evidently, your blindness has hindered you from gaining knowledge and your “death” awaits you around the corner. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Have you ever been in a relationship that you were not in denial about; you were once blind but life has led you to a place with a loved one where you know that he or she is not a positive influence in your life? Have you ever been so deep in love with a person that you know you are not supposed to be with? Has the pity and self –sacrificing type of love ever overwhelmed your life that you were unable to free yourself from a burden or a parasite? You want to leave, you have to leave but you don’t know how to leave? It is clear here that you have knowledge and no wisdom. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">These cases seem too familiar to me and I’m sure you can relate to one of these or both of these. The real question however is not if you’ve been there and done that but how do you protect yourself from such detrimental situations? How do we love and still be aware of what stands right in front of our faces? How do we love without pity and do what’s best for us?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">These situations involve two main elements that affect our existence: the heart and the mind. In cases like the first situation it is clear as day that this individual has allowed emotions (the heart) to control her. I see “blindness” connected to the nervous system of which the mind is connected to. Blindness is therefore a reflection of some problem within this system; and this is the same problem in relationships! When you are blindly in love it’s because you are not using your mind, you have allowed emotions to hinder the proper functioning of your “central nervous system”. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Furthermore, in case two it is clear that both heart and mind are involved yet the heart is still the element that has most control of the individual's actions! It is evident now that the solution in both cases is finding equilibrium. A balance in decision making between the heart and mind is essential in relationships. If we love blindly or allow emotions to have more precedence than the mind we are in for a lot hurt and pain. How do we find that balance (finding the solution to the solution) is where I’m at now and hopefully that too will come!</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Finally, we must realize that “death” will come eventually, no matter what we do; however, living life and enjoying relationships to the fullest depends on how well we make decisions. Pain is inevitable when we love. However, "death" and suffering is not necessary and making “balanced” decisions by using both our mind and heart will prevent us from having an early “death” or having to suffer for years. YES! This is only half of the solution but I pray that as you apply this to your life and relationships you find part two on you own.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <!--EndFragment-->Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-14375759864462269492010-05-19T19:35:00.001-07:002010-05-20T06:56:47.636-07:00The Philosopher's Curse<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">Today I have so many thoughts afloat the waters of my mind. For this reason I’ve decided to yield to my pen before my thoughts get the best of me.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Today I pose one of my thoughts in the form of a question. Why does the body of the enriched mind remain impoverished to the point that he is on the verge of death? Furthermore, I also urge you to think on this: why does the body, soul and mind of contemporary man have a high probability of early degeneration when so many philosophers before us have shown us different ways to keep the mind, body and soul alive in a world full of uncertainty?</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">On the first question I shall now expound further. Why is it that many of these same individuals that have rich thoughts die alone or in asylums, fall into severe depression or become suicidal? It is because the philosopher’s blessing is also his curse. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">On a smaller scale, imagine the teacher, writer, interpreter of love; the girl who spends time trying to understand this abstract thing, spending time interpreting different ways it is shown, the one who preaches about discerning the mates worth holding on to from those who are not worth anything. You turn to this girl for answers, for counsel and at the end you walk away reassured that she KNOWS.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">But in fact when life requires that the teacher knows, that she solves a tricky equation that she is supposed to know… she does not seem to know. Why is the teacher in the dark in the world that she herself has brought light to? You may say that the teacher is human and for that reason uncertainty is common and explainable. However, the reason why she is supposed to know is for that very same reason; it is because she is human like you and therefore she has acquired the skills and knowledge to teach. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">This brings us back to the curse! It is her knowing that is her curse! It is the ideology that she must always see beneath the surface, interpret that... beneath the surface; it is because she has trained herself to see not only with her eyes but with her ears, hands and heart that brings her to her falling. Furthermore, the idea that there is always something to figure out that will keep her body cold at night and her house lonely and no where close to becoming a home.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">The teacher has fallen into the snares of choosing between one school over another; deontology or consequentialism? She has lost herself in her questions and in her fight to find one answer. She is wrapped in defending theory and preaching theory so much that she has forgotten that in practice there will be anomalies and sometimes her theory is not the best choice.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">“Should I leave or should I stay? Is he worth the time? Is he interested? Why do I feel how I feel at this point that I am feeling it?” asks the so called teacher to herself.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Will this be the end of her? Will this point only be the beginning of her degeneration? Will she go crazy like Rousseau or Mill? Well I say there is a way out of this hole for her! A good end will only come if she makes her philosophy open to change. Her happy ending will depend on how well she is able to face practice—for the theories are there but what good is it if you know the truth, preach it but not live it especially when anomaly comes? She must arise then and find a new approach instead of sinking in traditional values. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">I implore you now whoever you are, friend, lover or student of a philosopher or teacher... to understand his or her weakness and that you ward off the thoughts that he or she is a hypocrite. After all, what good is it to despise or make a mockery of someone’s weakness when you too are weak? Also, love your teacher, learn and refute, debate and find other approaches to his or her theories and promise that you will at some moment become the teacher. For in that way you will not be like previous generations that never understood the philosophers who walked before they did and suffered in mind, body and soul because of their inability to learn!</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love.</p> <!--EndFragment-->Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-59280280527294475782010-05-07T01:16:00.000-07:002011-05-17T15:20:38.318-07:00The "L" word PT III<div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;">I tried so hard to find a subtitle for this one, but all my attempts were futile. Today I will attempt to continue the sequel. Initially, I must ask this question: How can something so refreshing, breath taking, bubbly, sensuous, unbelievably amazing leave you desolate and broken; how can it leave you searching? I am not going to talk about experiences today like I did in the past two entries on the "L" word; instead, I will try to illustrate best I can, one of its negative consequences and simultaneously plunge head first into this issue with hopes of finding its root.</span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;">Before I go on, I would like to add a poem written by a little girl who was deeply in love, a little girl whose story was far from simple. You see, this girl was the product of the "negative consequences of that "L" word; she was brought forth by a woman who felt desolate and was BROKEN. Although she was raised in love, this little girl yearned for that thing called love and like a rainbow she came as a sign that love could survive and it will be present even after the storms of life. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;">Though she brought love, embodied it and lived for it, she herself felt broken even before her first shot at the relationship game. It was from her big, broken heart that she wrote this poem to her first love, and it is only now that it is evident to me that how she was brought into the world may<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> have been the root of her brokenness. </span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Furthermore, because she was unaware of the reason for her sadness or feelings of emptiness she let her fragile, empty, ignorant and gullible heart lead her. It is no surprise that her choices were flawed and problematic and from her first relationship it was clear to see that she might be at risk of bringing forth a broken child, another rainbow child, another love child filled with patches of nothingness. </span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">As she grew she began building a foundation of values, notions, mores and ideologies about romance that was inevitably shaky from inception. It was this foundation that not only her first relationship but the ones to follow would be built on. A foundation that would lead to many unhappy endings, tears, constant brokenness, hurt and pain.</span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> Here are the words, from her little mouth, open mind and fragile heart:</span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> My Heart</span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" color: rgb(68, 68, 68); font-family:Tahoma, Verdana, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:13px;"><pre style="white-space: normal; "><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">I close my eyes and then I see straight through my heart</span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">It's scarred and broken in many places, with many voids. </span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Yes! Many spaces, and no matter what I do to push you away, in the mid of my heart you find a place. There, in the midst you bring me happiness.</span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"> Though I must admit that some scars my love, were done by you, but you mended the parts that were broken in two.</span></span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Even when I did you wrong, the love you had for me kept us going strong. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">And though my heart till this day is heavy, weak and tattered, having you in there is all that mattered….having you there is all that matters! </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">In the middle…. you're fixing my heart as time goes by and when I need</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">support its on you I rely. Though your words at times make me ponder …thoughts of you make my heart grow</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">fonder. Your words SUMTIMES STAB ME straight through, and it leaves bloody trails </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">and my being, my entire being pale and blue. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Yet still u bring me 2 life…you keep me going, and its because my love for you and yours for me is growing. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">I wish we could stop our fights they make me blue! </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">I wish you could stop wondering if I'm the right one for you </span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Because to me it's clear to see, that you and me are meant 2 be.</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Cute? At first....yes.... when you think about the words... DANGER ALERT!</span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Relationships leave you broken sometimes. The most dangerous however, are the results that come when a person goes into a relationship with a broken heart and comes out of it even more BROKEN. Today, I have no advice, after all, life will go on, hearts will continue to be broken and people will continue to initiate "bonds" ...READY OR NOT. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">However, I challenge you today to think back to your "first love" and rediscover some of the things that may have laid the foundation that all your other relationships were built on. Ask yourself what problems you have and how they may have come into existence. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Some of the problems may be evident and it's up to you now to find a way to resolve them. If you rather not fix it because you desire temporary happiness from a relationship that you know is not good for you than lasting happiness when you actually pull away and fix your problems.... so you can be whole again it's up to you. The ball is now in your court. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">P.S This little girl grew into a young woman who continually fell into the arms of young men who showed love but in the most uncaring ways. The young girl grew into a woman who found love in the arms of a man who was mentally and emotionally abusive. Will she produce brokenness also??? Will you produce brokenness also? Truth is, your seed is at risk!</span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">THE CYCLE WILL NEVER BE BROKEN IF YOU DON'T PUT YOUR MIND, HEART AND FEET TO THE TEST AND BREAK IT and stand firm by your decision.... or else it will go on and on and on, never ending, never changing and for "true love" you will be forever SEARCHING. </span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Today, I remember a love that has left me fragile and broken ever since she left me. A love that I cannot yet replace....a love that I may never know again. Love that will live forever and a love that I can't explain no matter how many words I use. To my sister, my best friend forever... Daniella Reid. I remember her today and always.</span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love....</span></span></div></span></span></pre></span></div>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-13484570622955133412010-04-15T21:23:00.001-07:002010-04-18T15:54:04.348-07:00LINES<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">So I remember some time ago I wrote about </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">M.I.S</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> and in that piece I spoke about how unhealthy it is to resort to the lyrics of Beyonce's “Irreplaceable” every time you and your significant other meet at the crossroads. Well, today I want to talk about a personal experience that led me to sing this song. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Essentially, it is important to distinguish between someone worth working with, worth appreciating and someone who should not be replaced with someone you need to forget. With that said, I am going to start and end with my girl Beyonce’s “Irreplaceable,” it’s so perfect and I must say I see it from a whole different perspective now.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">LINES….</span></span></b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">There are many things that you must draw lines between. Initially we must distinguish between </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">the boy or girl and the man or woman.</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> Following this, separating a mutually beneficial bond from a parasitic and one-sided symbiotic relationship, more explicitly and simplistically; we must separate </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">the user from the abuser. </span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Furthermore, </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">love that returns to you in bountiful amounts and the ones that return void,</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> those who </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">run towards commitment and the ones who run away from commitment. </span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">The ones who </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">find solace in you and the ones who find solace in girlfriends or boyfriends who only know the one sided story.</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> The </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">liars from the truth tellers—</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">the genuine ones from the phony ones. The list can go on people but ultimately these lines all lead to one conclusion:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">They tell us how to determine if our partners are WORTH SECOND, THIRD AND FOURTH CHANCES or in NEED TO HIT THE ROAD NEED TO BE REPLACED ....in a minute (According to Beyonce).</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">The real question is however: how do you tell, how do you know the difference? Sometimes, the answer may come plain and simple to you. The answer may be time, experience and prayer. However, this piece is dedicated to the men and women out there who are with smart, calculated, systematic partners; the tricky ones, the first of their kind, the Genesises out there. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">To draw the line, simply ask your partner some questions pertaining to these situations and it will become very clear.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">“standing in the front yard telling me how I’m such a fool….” Hey! Only a boy calls a woman who bought him a jaguar with HER name on it a fool. I boy can’t buy his own car or need to live in his woman’s house.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">How to draw the line between a man and a boy:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">A boy (or girl) </span></span></b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">is about adventure, about stagnation. He or she is about learning about himself. He or she leans on you and or friends for support. He or she does not know what he wants in life. A boy or girl cheats and lies because he is curious and desires to see the consequences of doing wrong. A boy or girl cannot keep promises. He or she is immature.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">A man (or woman) </span></span></b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">is driven, ambitious and not only talks about this but initiates different activities that lead to the fulfillment of his or her goals. If he or she does something, he or she often knows why he or she did it. A man or woman can tell you how he feels whenever necessary-- it may be simplistic and dry, but at the end of the day he said it. HE OR SHE CONFRONTS SITUATIONS. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">How to draw the line between a user and abuser?</span></span></b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">This one is simple yet so complex. When I say user I mean those who use you for love care and other necessities mutually. However, unlike mutually beneficial bonds, science teaches that parasitic relationships lead to the death of the stronger. Most parasites are smaller than their hosts, weaker and need the host to survive. Parasites like ticks live through hosts, the host eventually dies if the parasite is not killed or transferred to someone else. Interesting huh? Yeah, science rocks! </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">You see, if you are the only one trying to make things work, holding on to the threads that hold a relationship, trying to find solutions to relationship problems all on your own, if you feel drained physically and mentally.... </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0cm;margin-bottom:.0001pt;text-align: justify;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">IT'S BECAUSE YOUR PARTNER IS A BLOOD SUCKING PARASITE and if you don't get rid of him or her....you will die.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Bountiful or Void?</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">This is probably the most important line that must be drawn. However there is very little to say. If the love you receive from your partner is growing and blossoming it is the bountiful type of love. On the other hand, the love that returns to you void is that which is stagnant, fragile and empty. In essence, this is not love; it is a disguise a façade.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">For Commitment or Against?</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">If you are looking for a mate to settle down with and to build a family with then you most definitely will need someone who is not afraid of committing. Commitment is a symbol of his or her responsibility, maturity, “readiness” for something significant in his or her life and his or her confidence in herself or himself. It's no surprise then that inability to commit is something that can destroy a relationship as it hampers progress. If he or she is against or runs away from commitment….you need to run in the next direction. Save yourself the effort and time now because no matter how many years you are with him or her…on and off, truth is, he or she is not going to commit…EVER (unless something miraculous happens and Jesus comes down from heaven and makes some changes). </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Where does he rest his head?</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">About the “head” thing, no pun intended. What I mean is, you need to pay attention to where your partner finds solace, peace of mind and comfort. If you partner is always with their friends (worse if they are the opposite sex) ad not you, that’s A NO NO! I have experienced this myself, however, my main reason for saying this is because I think that this is </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">an opening for jealousy and many other evils that corrupt relationships.</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> If this is a problem in your relationship, talk to your partner, after two times…..you need to bounce. Clearly he or she does not need you…you are an option.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Liar liar?</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">If he or she is a liar and you cannot tell what’s genuine from the fake then you need to leave. If your relationship is built on lies then it is like the structure the dumb architect constructed on the sand that will blow away and crumble with any passing wind. A genuine man is not afraid to say the truth even if it may hurt. If it is something that will hurt then he will definitely know that tact and tone is important when he is trying to convey an important message. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Truth is the foundation on which any lasting union is built</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">; it’s like the rock upon which the smart architect built his structure—a building that will stand no matter how tumultuous the storm.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">In conclusion, it is important that we make these distinctions so that we can conserve our time and use it wisely. Why waste time with someone who is not worth it? Lines are important. Like my girl B said, “so don’t you ever for a second get to thinking…you’re irreplaceable.” Hello ladies and gents, if your partner is not on the right side of the </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">LINE</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"> he is not irreplaceable! </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><span style="font-family:Georgia;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:medium;">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love.</span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <!--EndFragment-->Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-57793417072556115602010-03-20T17:27:00.000-07:002010-03-27T00:36:12.411-07:00Apartments, Houses and Homes pt 2 (from courting to marriage)<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Yes! My expectations changed…again! I wanted a condominium now! Soon I was living in one that I was not paying for and <b>I had all the amenities I needed but I was still unhappy</b>. I wanted something of my own, that I paid for, that made me happy. In the condominium I thought I had a home, but it was not even a house. Instead, this condo was a pretty, flashy apartment that DIDN'T EVEN BELONG TO ME. Yes, I kept moving, I kept learning, and my expectations kept changing.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">With every change I was learning something new, something to expect, or not expect. It was not five months into living at the condo that I found my new place that I’m still at. It was all I expected and I needed. <b>My apartment is spacious, I have a walk in closet, kitchen, Jacuzzi and more! I love it and the price is right! I am content. </b>However, I have roommates. Who knows if that one flaw about my new apartment may lead to a different circumstance and new expectations?</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Just recently I was thinking about my journey from one apartment to the other. It was in that pensive moment that I realized that <b>this one will have it’s expiration date and soon I will need a house.</b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">You see I<b> learned not to have too many expectations about an apartment and not too little</b>—it’s about what makes me happy in the moment. If the apartment is to be, it will be. Furthermore, if it is something that should have a 2 year lease instead of 1 year, you will know. However, <b>if this place is taking too much out of you, it doesn’t fit you! Let it go!! </b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><b></b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Although I sit here, happy in my new place I know I will soon have to move on, yet, I<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>know the time has not come. <b>I’ve realized when it is time to break a lease and when it is necessary to settle for some time through it. </b>However, for now, it’s all about apartments and what suits my life as a young, adventurous student……soon when the time is right the house will come.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><o:p> </o:p></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal">Things to Note<o:p></o:p></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">On Apartments:<o:p></o:p></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Never expect an apartment to be a house and never expect a house to be a home. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Too many times we expect our little run down apartment to live up to the same expectations we have in our search for a house and home.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Maybe you were taken to that apartment for a reason: probably you were placed in the landlord’s life to help him or her out through a particular situation but that doesn’t mean you should settle.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">With that said, you need to be aware of when you should break the lease.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">If your apartment is lacking certain necessities and your parents and family advise you that those factors that it is lacking is needed, then listen to them! They’ve probably been apartment searching for a long time, moved on to house searching and most probably built a home—they are wise and they know best!</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Listen to the voice within when it tells you it’s time to move on from an apartment to investing your time and money into a house where you will make yourself a home.</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">On Houses<o:p></o:p></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">If you just can’t seem to find what you're looking for and you are not settling till you find the right house; if you’re tired of apartments and you know you’re ready for a house and it’s just not coming, </p> <p class="MsoNormal" align="center" style="text-align:center"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal">Try different listings: You may be looking in all the wrong places<o:p></o:p></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal">If you’re sure you have the right listings and you’re still at your parents' house (square one) maybe you need to stop looking, start praying! </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Also, for those who never had an apartment and you’re still living with your parents (at square one) keep in mind that some people need not go through the apartment stage before owning a house!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Please make sure you know if your house is not a home. If you have a house and you keep working hard to make it a home and it doesn’t work, maybe you need to find out why your work is futile. If the work is one sided, maybe you need to allow someone else to live there—let go because not all houses can be homes. Your home will come! Never settle especially if staying with that house is costing you a lot!</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal">On Homes<o:p></o:p></i></p> <p class="MsoNormal">A home goes beyond walls and windows. As the saying goes: home is where the heart is. A home is more than just what the eyes can see and the inanimate objects that make a house. A home takes sacrifice, love and lots of hard work to build. Furthermore, it takes the dedication of two people, not one.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">Having a home is not by chance. If you know your house is not a house but a home, appreciate it! Not everyone will have the joys you have found, so be happy that you were blessed with one.</p><p class="MsoNormal">Speak the truth and accept the truth in love.</p> <!--EndFragment-->Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-27105807816507144882010-03-20T17:15:00.000-07:002010-03-27T01:22:00.680-07:00Apartments, Houses and Homes pt 1 (from courting to marriage...)<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Life is about stages—getting through them, over them, past them. John Stuart Mill, an English philosopher, who talks about the metamorphosis of the state explains that the state is much like an individual. Mill expounds on his belief that just like man has a series of stages to pass through from infancy to adulthood, so too does the state. His book <i>On liberty</i> further explains that for the sake of the state, limitations on liberty change—the rules a parent lays down for a child is not the same they would for their 21 year old.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Mill also explains that there are indications that a state or person has become mature enough where circumstances, goals and limits on liberty change also. Today I want to talk about the stage where a young person is ready to look for his or her new apartment. I want to give some advice on what to look out for and what to look forward to—I WANT TO TALK ABOUT <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">EXPECTATIONS.</b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Initially it must be noted that age does not indicate maturity or immaturity but instead mental capacity determines maturity. For me, my apartment search started at a very young age. Circumstances came where it was time for me to start my life anew and I was placed in a situation where I had to make my own choices about “apartments, houses and homes.” I had so many expectations, yet all I wanted was contentment: nothing too flashy or exorbitant—after all I am a student!</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">My first apartment was amazing… in my eyes. My friend told me it was a good find. To me, this place was the cutest, coziest apartment I could ever come across. On the other hand, my aunt thought it was a bad idea and I shouldn’t settle. Instead I agreed to rent it and I thought my search was over. </p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">My mom came to see me and from the time she saw it, she was appalled (hahaha). Oh, yeah…I forgot to mention that this apartment lacked some serious necessities. Yes, it was just enough space, brand new, well painted and comfortable enough to put the mind at ease and make any girl content,but, it <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">lacked a full kitchen</b>! My mom looked at it in horror and said, “well if you like it, that’s most important but how are you going to cook, will you live on junk forever?” I closed my eyes and thought of all the good times I had with my apartment, quickly opened my eyes again and said “yes mom, I’m content and I will make do.”</p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">Circumstances changed again and I had found my other half! Soon my apartment became dull as she took the new spot of number one priority in my life. I wasn’t spending time at the apartment; instead, I was out having fun with my new best friend. Soon, settling with my apartment was not such a good idea. Before, I was so content with what it had that it out weighed what it lacked but now, I wanted something better! After getting my joy from elsewhere the flaws of my place was all I could think of and <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal">I wanted something better. <o:p></o:p></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:justify">With <b>new circumstances came new expectations</b>. My other half decided that I should move in with her. Her place was funky, cool, clean and it had a full kitchen-- <b>it had all that my old place lacked</b>. She showed me the place and I fell in love! We had an amazing summer together! The apartment was perfect for partying and entertaining. It is no surprise that at that phase of my life I began losing myself. The apartment started changing me. However, the glam didn't last for long. Soon, the music, the alcohol, the fun withered and I started seeing the place for what it was. Soon I realized the place was infested with mice, soon the once funky place was now murky and sullen. Soon my other half became some who resented me and who I began to abhor and..... I had to leave.</p> <!--EndFragment-->Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-81620899707252808112010-02-27T18:38:00.000-08:002010-03-01T10:31:19.704-08:00M.I.SNow this blog is specially for my ladies. Guys, this is not one of those extremely biased Feminist based entries that will make you cringe on reading it-- I invite you to read it too, after all, you may be enlightened and finally understand some things you never ventured to discover about your significant other.<div><br /></div><div>Initially, I want to say that for me this issue, another "syndrome" that women suffer from, is because of my complete lack of trust for people. However, this entry's aim is not to resolve this trust issue or to detect why I have become so untrusting. Instead, I invite you to find out the root of your syndrome and your symptoms of <b>M.I.S</b> so that you can treat it and get rid of it!</div><div><br /></div><div>By now you must be asking yourself what I might be referring to and probably some random thoughts have been ushered into your mind. Like an inquisitive child you are sitting anxiously at your computer asking yourself "why is this entry three paragraphs in and I STILL don't know what Jem is talking about?!" haha. Well here I go....</div><div><br /></div><div>M.I.S or <b>Miss Independent Syndrome</b> is yet another syndrome that women and their partners continually face today. Before I go on I must give a little introduction about this syndrome and how it has found it's way to the top "syndromes" women are in a constant battle with. </div><div><br /></div><div>Saying that one of the most oppressed groups over the past century or so has been women is an understatement. Anglo Saxon, African, Caribbean, Muslim, whatever the sub group, we have been tried and tested by an extremely discriminatory system. <b>This system we live in is corrupt</b>: it is chauvinistic, it is controlled by men and places their interest before women's. Furthermore, this system does not treasure the sameness and difference between the two sexes; one that confines the woman to the home, one that claims that we are not as strong as, as intellectually capable, as competent as men and this system is culpable for the emergence of this syndrome.</div><div><br /></div><div>To add, because of this system, women have taken on the fight to attain equity that they deserve and are placed in a position where they must work twice as hard to gain respect--something that we yearn for after being oppressed for so long. Indeed, some things have changed and it seems as though women have been liberated but this form of discrimination still lingers. As a result, women are still fighting. </div><div><br /></div><div>Because of this, women have been misled into thinking that we must also fight our husbands/partners--we carry this fighting mentality into our relationships. Now, "I can do it on my own, who needs a man anyway" is what you find yourself saying ever so often. What about the times you would use Beyonce's irreplaceable to console yourself after an argument? What about when you refuse to let him put on your jacket or pull out your chair?</div><div><br /></div><div>Furthermore, besides being rooted in our history as women, this struggle is dormant and awakened by certain stimuli. For me, when I feel unguarded and love comes around, that's where the symptoms of <b>M.I.S</b> step into the picture.</div><div><br /></div><div>Maybe you have lived with your mom in a single parent home all your life, maybe you watched your mom continuously abused, maybe you just don't trust people.... but whatever it be, this may lead you to <b>M.I.S </b>symptoms, symptoms that will subtly cripple your relationship.</div><div><br /></div><div>Remember ladies, men are human too (Although they don't act like it sometimes haha). The first step in fighting this syndrome is recognizing that <b>we can make or break our relationships (it's not always their fault).</b> Secondly, it's more than okay to be treated like a virtuous woman. Third, establish that in your relationship there's no hierarchy, but instead two people who complement each other walking along life's pathway hand in hand-- work together (your partner is not your competition).</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Miss Independent Syndrome</b> is on the rampage and we need to take some precautionary measures ladies. Yes, he's replaceable, yes you feel like you can do everything by yourself and yes we live in a corrupt imbalanced system but why let that ruin a romance that may lead to new beginnings and a love sealed companionship? </div><div><br /></div><div>I know that all you want is some R.E.S.P.E.C.T, but allowing the symptoms of <b>M.I.S</b> to enter into your relationship will only do the reverse....YOU WILL BE DISRESPECTED! If you're not disrespected directly because your guy is a softie, it will come indirectly when he gets tired of you and moves on to someone who appreciates chivalry and you.... you'll end up lonely at 60 carrying on a conversation that sounds like this: " I never needed a man and I still don't need one...oh...and children...who would want such monsters?"</div><div><br /></div><div>I think that our biological systems, our sex drive, even the bible is enough evidence that a man is made for a woman and vice versa. So ladies you are not meant to be alone forever (unless God has a special calling for you whereby a companion has no place in your life). Treat your partner with love and respect and allow him to show you the same sentiments.</div><div><br /></div><div>Speak and accept the truth in love.....</div>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1533804943346761864.post-38372162414265557272010-02-17T19:11:00.000-08:002010-02-21T11:04:10.229-08:00Bringing Moderation Back into the Equation<div>On February 8th I left land and I hurried aboard the Carnival Destiny cruise ship. I must admit that I was eager to partake in everything the crew had to offer--after all, I paid for it and I was determined to get my money's worth. However, like every other experience I've been blessed to see in my short life, this cruise opened up my eyes to so many things. The first issue that I must talk about is the proliferating culture of "imbalanced living".</div><div><br /></div><div>On the Carnival Destiny one could eat all one can put in one's mouth. There are nine restaurants on board, including a 24 hour pizzeria, ice cream station, coffee and tea station and not to mention...24 hr FREE room service. On the Destiny you can party and drink all night long...and the casino won't close until you want it to. There's non stop fun but if you want you can sleep all day long! On the destiny you can do anything you want as much as you desire to! This, we call paradise, this we call fantasy, this we call good living. When did imbalanced living become the dream?</div><div><br /></div>It's becoming increasingly evident that the world is severely imbalanced, however we must pay attention to the fact that this attribute is in no way natural. Looking externally, it is clear as day that there are wealth gaps globally and most notably, the average American's way of life (which has become the standard to judge all other cultures) leaves the word "moderation" out of the equation.<div><br /></div><div>Furthermore, it is no surprise that human beings--living entities who are in essence; minute parts of this ecosystem, mere pieces of a mosaic, are affected by external imbalances and vice versa. The question is, how can we bring moderation back into the equation?</div><div><br /></div><div>Initially, we must recognize that sometimes, change comes from the bottom up. With that said, individuals must make some conscious decisions to restore internal equilibrium. After all, as the minute parts of the system alters itself, so too will the bigger picture in time.</div><div><br /></div><div>When was the last time you sat down and thought about how imbalanced your way of life has become as you've gotten older? How much food do you waste? Or maybe you have a problem with prioritizing. What about your time management skills? Are you frugal? How do you spend your money and what things are "ok" for you to spend your money on? With that said, what does your closet look like? Do you give to any charitable organizations? Why not start your own?</div><div><br /></div><div>Indeed, there are those people who find themselves weary with life, constantly troubled and confused since they believe with every part of their being that they should have peace of mind. Why? Only because they're continually doing good for others and not for once do they do things for themselves. What we must recognize is that being selfless is not the way either--this is also a case of an imbalanced lifestyle.<br /><div><br /></div><div>Balancing the equation called "a healthy lifestyle" where we can truly be happy, we must bring moderation back into the picture. Instability is an evil that can subtly creep into your life. It may take just one more beer, one more cigarette, one more snack added to your daily intake of food to usher in a new beginning of unhealthy lifestyle. Be it mentally, physically or emotionally.</div><div><br /></div><div>So let's eat, drink, enjoy life, sleep and all other parts of life moderately. I'm not perfect and I too must embrace this notion, but maybe you can start soon and invite your friends to do the same. After all, when you have someone who encourages you when you falter it's easier to attain the ultimate goal. Let's start a movement... a movement that will bring equilibrium.</div><div><br /></div><div>Speak the truth and accept the truth in love.</div><div><br /></div></div>Jemmimahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03255814677580409387noreply@blogger.com0